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Saturday, December 11, 2010

Please Pray!

The more I have read and researched, the more worried I have become. I feel that the babies should have already had heartbeats on Thursday. I am the only EA blogger who has not detected a heartbeat by the 6-week mark (those of us who had 6 week ultrasounds - mostly NEDC patients). I am scared. I know fear is a sin, but it is so hard to trust. Aaron has told me not to google and use the internet as a crutch for not trusting in God. I know that God will have His perfect plan no matter what. I read in Psalm 139 yesterday about God knitting us together in the womb and numbering all of our days. These babies' days have been numbered and Aaron and I have no idea how many days God has destined them for. We are only stewards of them for as long as He has sovereignly determined. I don't know what Tuesday's ultrasound will show. I am scared and trying to trust God, but humanly speaking, that is hard today and I feel like mess. Please pray.

I do have my follow-up call with Dr. K on Monday and I guess he will shed some more light on the situation, because I've only talked to nurses at this point and not a doctor.

19 comments:

heathermohr said...

If it makes you feel better, we did not detect a heartbeat at 5 weeks 5 days. Our next ultrasound wasn't until 6 weeks 5 days, and then we had a heartbeat. I know it's scary, but it really is still early!!! I frequent a lot of pregnancy forums, and I know plenty of women who had no hb at 6 weeks, but did a few days later. Hang in there momma!!!

Katie said...

Praying for you! I am sure this is so hard. Hang in there!

Diane said...

I'll be praying for sure! I do think that it could easily have been too early, though. I believe my clinic waits until 7 weeks for the first ultrasound for that reason.

sarahepm said...

With both my pregnancies my doctors (2 different doctors) specifically told me they would not be checking for a heartbeat until 7 weeks because they usually can't find it before then and they don't like to worry parents unnecessarily. I am praying so hard for you guys, but I hoped I could offer some reassurance along with those prayers. I agree with heathermohr who said that plenty of women can't detect a heartbeat right at 6 weeks, but did a few days later. They develop so fast in there that mere days is sometimes all it takes. Love you guys!

Em said...

Maybe it wasn't that they didn't have a heartbeat, but that the equipment where you were wasn't advanced enough to find one yet?? You don't even know what day they implanted and what day God decided to jump start that heart quiver. It is so hard to not worry. I have noticed that the worry just continues with each step and will continue even after they are born. It is a journey of us learning to trust God and let him have the control. I am trying to remind myself of this everyday. Luke 12:25-32

Room for More said...

You have had some beautiful comments. Em said everything I would say perfectly too.

I am proud of you for sharing your fears & vulnerability and allowing us to pray for you. You have a wise husband indeed and I know that you are submitting to his leading and not googling any more. : )
after one m/c after another, I can tell you, I know the fear you are living and it is a constant (every few seconds sometimes) surrender to our Lord with the fear. His perfect love casts out fear. Even though we know the babies days are pre-numbered and that God chose the days before time began, we still will struggle. It is part of our sanctification to continue to surrender. It is a blessing that you will be able to speak with Dr. K for reassurance on Monday.
I will be praying for you, your twins, and your hubby as you approach this next week!
many hugs & love,
Shannon

Lisa said...

Praying for you and your little ones!

Rebecca said...

Remember I was telling you that we had our ultrasound at 6 weeks 6 days and didn't have a heartbeat on 1 of the triplets. I was just talking to one of my close friends, who just had her 5th baby yesterday. Her doctor didn't find a heartbeat until week 8, day 2.

The internet can be a like a growing cancer to the mind! If you look at the big picture, God has done some amazing things with these lives & it's nothing for Him to grant beating hearts next week!
Praying for you!

happymomof2 said...

Praying for you!

Ashley said...

STOP GOOGLING!!! LOL- I know, easier said than done! God has great plans for you guys and nothing can thwart His plan. I like what Em said. Praying for peace for you!

Baby Whaley said...

Hey girl,I know how nerve wracking this time can be. It is so easy to get caught up in the worry that comes with pregnancy. I did not even see a fetal pole at my 5 wk 5 day ultrasound-only a yolk sack. I went back at 7 1/2 weeks and saw the heartbeat then. I bet you those little heartbeats are flickering away right now. Try to focus on the positive-you saw two beautiful yolk sacs and fetal poles that measured on time. 6 weeks is early to see a heartbeat. I am praying for you and I know that you will see those sweet heartbeats on the next ultrasound!

Jen: Proud Mom of 7 Adopted Miracle Blessings said...

I wasn't allowed to google either- it will make you insane!!!! trust the Lord, then what your nurses said...

Hugs!!!

Leigh said...

Praying for you and Aaron and your babies!

Elizabeth and Dan said...

Thinking of you both during this tough time of trusting and waiting.

jesswilson said...

We had our ultrasound at 6 weeks and 4 days and had heartbeats, but Dr. K was surprised we saw and heart them...must have been very good equipment. The internet is dangerous...best not to read. :) Praying for ALL of you.

Jessica

carrie said...

One of our identical twins didn't have a heartbeat at 6 weeks, and I remember thinking that if they are identical yet one doesn't have a heartbeat, it didn't seem good. At 8 weeks, they both had h/b's, much to our surprise. It really is too early to be sure, but I know how crazy the waiting can make us moms! Praying for you and I think you are right to stay away from googling!! Hang in there!

Christina said...

The technology that can reassure us can also make us worry more! I will never schedule an ultrasound for earlier that 7 weeks--it's just not worth the extra worry because sometimes 6 weeks is just too early.

I know it's so hard not to consult with Dr. Google--I'm guilty of way too much of it myself, but all you really can do is wait it out. You aren't doing anyone (yourself, your babies or your husband) any good by worrying. Ignorance really is bliss! I am glad that I didn't know 2 weeks ago what I know now. I've had a relatively nice time time just being pregnant. Had I known...well, it simply would have been torture waiting for the inevitable. Talk about the worst 2ww!! And, if all is well, then you didn't waste any of your happy pregnant time worrying, worrying and worrying.

I hope you get some fantastic news tomorrow!

BTW, with Genevieve I had an early ultrasound at 5w5d because of some bleeding and all we saw was a gestational sac and a yolk sac--no fetal pole. There was also a 2nd spot that may have been a 2nd gest sac or a spot of blood. So much happens in such a short amount of time--you just need to give the little ones some time!

Britney said...

jennifer-- i'm going to give you some tough love right now. STOP. WORRYING. STOP. GOING. ON. THE. INTERNET. Listen to your husband. Fall on your face before your God and cast your fears to Him alone. Pace, pace, peace. Just rest in God alone.

Emily said...

praying...